I Hate Change — But It Changed Me!
Because sometimes, the change you run from is the one sent to free you.
I hate change.
Truly.
New things make me nervous.
Even changing my email timing felt like a big deal.
For years, I’ve written to you every Wednesday and Sunday at 7 AM.
It became a ritual — just like my morning chai.
Now I’m changing that too.
From today, I’ll write to you on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 12 PM.
Three times a week.
And guess what?
I hate that too. 😄
Itna sa bhi change kya zaroori tha?
(Was this small change even necessary?)
That’s what my mind kept saying.
I kept thinking — why fix what isn’t broken?
Consistency is the key to life, right?
But inside me, something was restless.
There’s so much more I want to share,
so many people I want to reply to,
so many stories waiting to be told.
And yet, a part of me whispered —
“Don’t do it, Hitesh. You’ll mess up the rhythm.”
That’s when I realised…
this isn’t just about timing.
It’s about my relationship with change itself.
The Truth Behind My Resistance
It’s funny — I’ve resisted change all my life.
I didn’t want to change my house.
Didn’t want to change my beliefs about money.
Didn’t even want to change my relationship patterns.
Why should I change for my wife?
If she has a problem, let her change.
Why should I change how I handle money?
If life wants to give me abundance, let it come.
Deep down, I was scared — not lazy.
Change felt like losing control.
And when you’ve grown up watching your parents struggle to stay safe,
change doesn’t feel exciting — it feels dangerous.
The Constellation
During a Family Constellation session,
I saw something that changed everything.
My representative for “Change” stood far from me — calm, patient, glowing.
I felt anger rise in me.
Then fear.
My facilitator asked,
“Who else in your family was afraid of change?”
And suddenly, I saw the faces.
My grandparents during Partition.
My father, who was acting out the beliefs of his Father!
My mother, who embraced change always but was never seen by me.
Their fear of losing stability had travelled down to me.
I wasn’t afraid of change.
I was carrying their fear of survival.
The Root Chakra
That’s when I remembered something I’d written months ago —
about the Root Chakra, our base energy of safety and belonging.
(If you haven’t read it yet, you can read that post here → Are You Growing a Tree of Doubt Within You?)
When the Root Chakra is weak,
we cling to what’s familiar, even if it’s painful.
We call it loyalty, but it’s really fear.
I realised I’d built my life on that fear.
Every decision was about staying safe, not feeling alive.
The Shift
That day in the field, I looked at “Change” again.
She didn’t look scary anymore.
She looked like freedom.
I said softly,
“If my ancestors could survive the storms,
maybe I can learn to dance in the rain.”
And something loosened inside me.
My legs felt lighter.
I could breathe again.
Since then, change hasn’t stopped coming —
but I’ve stopped running away.
The Mirror
A woman in our community — let’s call her Neeta — told me once:
“Hitesh, I’ve lived in the same house for 27 years.
I know every crack in the wall.
But I also know every dream I’ve buried in those walls.”
After her own Constellation, she moved to another city.
She said,
“I thought I’d lose everything familiar.
Instead, I found myself.”
And now, I see that happening every week —
people stepping out of their old patterns,
rebuilding their roots with courage instead of fear.
For You
Maybe you’re also sitting in front of some decision right now.
A job, a relationship, a move.
And you’re whispering to yourself —
“I don’t want to change. I just want peace.”
But maybe peace is on the other side of change.
If your soul has been restless lately,
it might not be asking you to change everything.
It might be asking you to trust life again.
🌈 Join the 8-Day Chakra Constellation Journey
This November, we’re beginning
8 Days of Chakra Constellations – Healing Family, Energy & Self through Systemic Work.
The first night, we’ll begin with the Root Chakra,
healing fear, scarcity, and ancestral memories around survival.
You’ll stand in the field with others just like you,
and feel your roots reconnect to safety, to belonging, to life itself.
Maybe that’s where your next change begins —
not by force, but by flow.
With love,
Hitesh Bhatia
Founder, Constellation Facilitator, Cycle Breaker